"For what you have done I will always praise you in the presence of your faithful people. And I will hope in your name, for your name is good." Psalm 52:9
I found this verse interesting this morning. It is attributed to David. You know the guy: slays giants and lions and bears. He's nicknamed, a man after God's own heart and is often thought of as a beacon of faith. So when I came to this verse, I was surprise to see him emphasize that he would praise "in the presence of your faithful people."
As I've said before I tend to think about things or settle on thoughts that many can easily glass over. But this part got me thinking this morning. It's easy to praise God in the presence of His faithful people. I don't have any problem at church or my son's Christian school, talking about all God has done in my life or daily is doing. With close Christian friends, prayer partners or other confessed believers, I talk about the miracles I've seen.
But why does it stop there? Why can I offer to pray to anyone, but fear praising who He is? Why do I worry about how others will take that? Why do any of us believe that only believers can understand? Even behind the glass on social media, I feel like I have to weigh my words. What if people don’t like what I have to say? What if they doubt my words? What if they make fun of my childlike faith? Why do I care what they think? Do their thoughts change who I am? The reality is that He is the core of who I am. I wake up every morning and am able to put one foot in front of the other, because of the hope I have in Him. I try to live every moment, base every decision, walk every day in who He created me to be. I may fail (often and sometimes hugely) but His grace allows me to try again.
Abba, I am going turn this psalm around. I will hope in your name for it is good. And for all you have done, I will praise your name to all people. Thank you for your patience with my insecurity. Thank you for your mercy when I fail. Thank you blessing me when I don’t deserve it. Thank you for your grace and your strength as I face the giants. May my faith overcome my fear and praise you. Amen.
Tuesday, October 9, 2018
Sunday, October 7, 2018
Seriously?!?
Today started as one of those days. We all have them. Awake too early, not feeling 100%, mind swirling with so much on it that it hurts. But, I don't like to miss church. It's not that I think God would punish me for not going or anything like that, but I do feel like giving God this dedicated time is the very least I can do to honor all He's done for me. We go to the 8:00 am service. The very early service filled with seniors and classic hymns played on an antique pipe organ. Not really my thing, but it's my mom's service, it gets me out with enough time to do things during the day, and it allows me to check up on all those matriarchs and patriarchs that have been a part of my life since childhood.
So this morning, I open the hymnal to see the processional has 7 verses. Seriously?!?!? Feeling my eyes roll, I begin to try to fight my agitation. You see, I'm a mind person. If anyone could ever hear my thoughts, it would probably exhaust and slightly entertain them. The inner arguments that go on, the crazy path my thoughts take, the intense thinking on the most unusual things, the fussing at myself. I'm sitting in church mentally scolding myself for my impatience and agitation. Is God agitated when He has to wait on me? Does He get impatient when I don't do things His way? Is He daily rolling His eyes at me? I am rotely going through the prayers while my mind continues its own path. Then the collect is read:
"Almighty and everlasting God, you are always more ready to hear than we to pray, and to give more than we either desire or deserve: pour upon us the abundance of your mercy, forgiving us those things of which our conscience is afraid, and giving us those good things for which we are not worthy to ask, except through the merits and meditation of Jesus Christ our Savior."
I can't help but giggle because instantly my heart was touched. He answers the questions of my head and my heart. As the service goes on, He continues to shower over me His love, thoughts and promises through His word:
"What are human begins that you are mindful of them, or mortals, that you care for them? You have made them for a little while lower than the angels; you have crowned them with glory and honor, subjecting all things under their feet."
Then came the sermon. It began with a retelling of the stoning of the woman deemed a sinner in John 8. She was condemned, yet Jesus' response was, "Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." The story continues, "When they heard it, they went away, one by one, beginning with the elders; and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus straightened up (from bending down and writing on the ground) and said to her, 'Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?...Neither do I condemn you. Go your way, and from now on do not sin again."
God's mercy is big enough to cover our sins. He gave His son's life to so that we could be free. Yet we not only face the condemnation of others, but of ourselves. This morning as I was busy questioning whether God was as exasperated with me as I was at the world and myself, He was busy preparing a message of His love. While I was begrudgingly facing the day, He was beautifying my view. And while I sang the final hymn with a different attitude in my heart, He was preparing within me a peace that allowed me to come home and nap.
Abba, thank you that even when I am impatient, you are patient. When I am anxious, you have peace. When I question, you answer. When I struggle with frustration, you shower with love. While I condemn myself, you offer me grace. Help me to never forget to accept all you offer and to share that with all those around me.
So this morning, I open the hymnal to see the processional has 7 verses. Seriously?!?!? Feeling my eyes roll, I begin to try to fight my agitation. You see, I'm a mind person. If anyone could ever hear my thoughts, it would probably exhaust and slightly entertain them. The inner arguments that go on, the crazy path my thoughts take, the intense thinking on the most unusual things, the fussing at myself. I'm sitting in church mentally scolding myself for my impatience and agitation. Is God agitated when He has to wait on me? Does He get impatient when I don't do things His way? Is He daily rolling His eyes at me? I am rotely going through the prayers while my mind continues its own path. Then the collect is read:
"Almighty and everlasting God, you are always more ready to hear than we to pray, and to give more than we either desire or deserve: pour upon us the abundance of your mercy, forgiving us those things of which our conscience is afraid, and giving us those good things for which we are not worthy to ask, except through the merits and meditation of Jesus Christ our Savior."
I can't help but giggle because instantly my heart was touched. He answers the questions of my head and my heart. As the service goes on, He continues to shower over me His love, thoughts and promises through His word:
"What are human begins that you are mindful of them, or mortals, that you care for them? You have made them for a little while lower than the angels; you have crowned them with glory and honor, subjecting all things under their feet."
Then came the sermon. It began with a retelling of the stoning of the woman deemed a sinner in John 8. She was condemned, yet Jesus' response was, "Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." The story continues, "When they heard it, they went away, one by one, beginning with the elders; and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus straightened up (from bending down and writing on the ground) and said to her, 'Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?...Neither do I condemn you. Go your way, and from now on do not sin again."
God's mercy is big enough to cover our sins. He gave His son's life to so that we could be free. Yet we not only face the condemnation of others, but of ourselves. This morning as I was busy questioning whether God was as exasperated with me as I was at the world and myself, He was busy preparing a message of His love. While I was begrudgingly facing the day, He was beautifying my view. And while I sang the final hymn with a different attitude in my heart, He was preparing within me a peace that allowed me to come home and nap.
Abba, thank you that even when I am impatient, you are patient. When I am anxious, you have peace. When I question, you answer. When I struggle with frustration, you shower with love. While I condemn myself, you offer me grace. Help me to never forget to accept all you offer and to share that with all those around me.
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